COLUMN: John Scott G is a writer of non-fiction and fiction appearing in print, broadcast, and digital media. He frequently works in communications, which means marketing, advertising, and various forms of hype. He is a contributor to eNewsChannels, the Music Industry Newswire, the Advertising Industry Newswire, and other online magazines. Visit JohnScottG.com for more information.
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 29: What Do You Do? Sooner or later, everyone has a bad job. Usually sooner, because first jobs can be a bitch. My first employment, unless you count mowing lawns, was at a mall where I worked in a Pickwick Bookshop. That chain of book stores is now defunct but I am almost eighty percent positive it wasn’t because of hiring me.
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 28: Dazed and Amused. High as a kite, that’s what I was. More expressively, I was as high as a helium-filled balloon that had just escaped the grasp of a perplexed five-year old kid who was now wondering why gravity wasn’t bringing back his rapidly disappearing toy.
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eNewsChannels COLUMN: God has quite a sense of humor, once you get past all the smiting, tormenting, and killing. Whether setting things straight, settling old scores, or showing humankind what horrors are coming if we don’t buy enough copies of this book, the one-liners and [...]
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 27: College Daze. ‘What’s your major?’ At various times in my college career, I was able to give at least four authoritative and definitive replies: ‘Theater Arts,’ I said. ‘Filmmaking.’ I said. ‘Art,’ I said. ‘English,’ I said. None of these responses were lies; I just kept switching my major.
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eNewsChannels COLUMN: Everyone has a mother, and every mother has the capacity to be magical, magnificent, and magnanimous. Too often, the celebration of these amazing creatures called Mom is limited to just one day in May. When my mom was first diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, I [...]
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 26: A First Kiss. So there I was, out on a date with a girl who was the personification of beauty. The splendor of her presence was so powerful that later in life I would keep her in mind when writing certain song lyrics, such as ….
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eNewsChannels COLUMN: Recognition of R. Buckminster Fuller’s genius is not as widespread as it should be, which is understandable given his near-total lockout from mainstream discourse and a fundamental quake-in-their-boots reaction by today’s politicians. Inventor, writer, and futurist R. Buckminster Fuller was called “Bucky” except [...]
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 25: Dating Tips. She was beautiful. She was lovely. She was alluring. She was desirable. The lady was more intoxicating than absinthe. A gorgeous and stunning woman, she was at the same time a vision of incomparable girlish deliciousness. More importantly, she was living testimony to the existence of a higher power.
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 24: Cheating Death in Cars, 1. As soon as I was legally able to drive, the Southern California freeway system became a total delight. In my car, I was free! Put on some music and head on over to any part of the city at any time of the day or night. Pure joy!
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 23: Mouthing Off. Some of my previous odes to self-pleasure are having an influence in the world, starting with the FookMovie production of the ‘Free Nude Photos’ music video and continuing in this caprice…. Please join us now in celebration of one the greatest contributions America has made to world culture: The Talk Show!
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eNewsChannels Column: The know-nothings really need to have a few facts presented to them, as you’ll find if you try to have a reasonable discussion with a Republican. I have overheard several discussions recently between conservatives and liberals, between corporatists and populists, between regressives and [...]
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 22: To Teach, One Must Know. It has always been my feeling that school is a form of organized torment and cruelty. Yes! I hear every student say. But I also hear from parents: I don’t wanna hafta watch the damn kids all day!
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 21: Show-and-Tell. Returning from a 3-week vacation in the middle of the school year is a disorienting experience. Everyone else had been attending class while I had been gallivanting around the country. It’s not like coming back from summer or Christmas break, where you’re all starting things over again on an equal basis.
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 20 – Road Trips and Book Reports. I have spent a lot of time in motel rooms. It’s not what you think. For my parents, a great vacation was a drive across the nation. So, from an early age, I was in a family that was devoted to the Road Trip. And since we didn’t sleep in our car, I learned a bit about Holiday Inns, Best Westerns, Econo-Lodges, Motel 6s, etc.
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 19 – Cheating Death. Death has often come looking for me. The encephalitis. The emissions from the nuclear factory. The DDT. And there were a couple of spectacular automobile crashes. But in addition, I’ve gone through a whole bunch of near-death experiences, including elementary school, Catholic school, middle school, and high school.
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eNewsChannels COLUMN: Too many times, the use of words such as ‘patriot’ and ‘patriotism’ comes from a highly politicized place. The terms become part of campaign speeches or commercials. Let’s examine some acts that can be accurately called patriotic.
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 18 – ‘Vengeful God.’ As I was growing up, lots of people spent lots of time trying to get me into a cult. Unfortunately, my family was part of this effort. ‘Give it a try,’ they said, speaking about one group or another. If it wasn’t the Quakers, it was the Baptists. If it wasn’t the Baptists, it was the Lutherans. If it wasn’t the Lutherans, it was the Catholics. And so on.
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eNewsChannels COLUMN: A guilty-as-charged politician gets advice about his court case. A campaign contribution is made to obtain more community service. This is how it works at the local level. Note: all names in this article have been changed.
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 17 – ‘Secret Sex.’ When my family moved to Los Angeles, my dad went to work for a drink tank. No, that’s not right. Think tank. Yeah, that’s what I meant. Not a fake one like the Cato Institute or the Heritage Foundation. Those are ersatz ‘research’ groups funded by the Koch brothers. Fortunately, my dad worked at an actual think tank.
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 16: Behind the Screen. Art, music, literature, drugs, and alcohol were a big part of the curriculum at William Lovelace Binkley Academy High School. Admittedly, drugs and alcohol weren’t a part of the official curriculum. They were more of an informal thing. But because of the school’s emphasis on art, music, and literature, a lot of students were, as they say, self-medicating.
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 15: Switch On, Switch Off. Having access to the high school auditorium public address system proved to be quite beneficial for the drama students. We attached a switch to the snipped wires so we could use the P.A. when we needed it for play production.
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 14 – Backstage Pass. My parents liked going to the movies, so I was introduced to lots of different kinds of films when I was a kid. (Yes, this is a bit of a flashback — we’ll be doing that from time to time, but don’t worry, I’ll try to warn you.)
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eNewsChannels COLUMN: A sporting event where it doesn’t matter who wins. A sixty-minute game crammed into four hours of television programming. An exercise in organized hype. An excuse for overeating and excessive drinking. Yup, it’s Super Bowl time again. Yay! But there are battles brewing outside the game.
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 13 – Hi, School. You may not believe it, but the powers-that-be at middle school allowed me to move on to high school. Go figure. I believe they said something like ‘After in-depth deliberation, it is our judgment that it will be to the reciprocal mutual advantage of all concerned parties that John Scott now move forward with the next stage of his educational pursuits.’ Translation: get this guy the hell out of here.
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 12 – Numbers Game. Jeanne was a quiet flirt. Whether she was in a classroom, out on the quad, or in the lunchroom, she didn’t say much but people gathered around her anyway. Attractive women can achieve this. It’s called the ‘moths-to-a-flame’ phenomenon.
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eNewsChannels COLUMN: Politics is sometimes the art of perception. If you can define the way people discuss a topic, you are a few steps closer to influencing how they vote on it. All political parties attempt to do this, of course, but some teams are [...]
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 11 – Get on the Bus. A school bus might seem like a personal injury lawyer’s wet dream. A long metal tube on wheels. Very high center-of-gravity. No seat belts for the passengers. Often over-crowded, with three kids in seats designed for two people.
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 10 – Boss Angeles. There are two possible openings to this chapter. Here’s the straight-to-the-point version: Our family had enough of Fort Richland and moved. And here’s the arty-as-hell version: After a few years in the richly rigid and unintentionally Dadaistic city of Richland, the entire family was ready for a saner lifestyle and a more cultured existence. But we didn’t get it because we moved to Los Angeles.
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 9 – Playing in the Poison. My dad was speaking on the telephone. Well, mostly he was listening intently on the telephone. From what he was saying, it sure seemed like it was a Very Serious Conversation. Which was no big deal to me as a kid except for one thing: this Very Serious Conversation was about me. I wanted so much to be in on both sides of the discussion but of course could only catch one-half of it.
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eNewsChannels COLUMN: Ideas and opinions come flying at you non-stop in Mark Morford’s essays. His eye-opening concepts are presented with slashing images and hyperbolic language. This results in delightful shock waves for the brain and jarring karma for the soul.
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 8 – Don’t Look, Don’t Count. The amount of plutonium produced at the plant each day was Pop Secret. Wait, no, that’s a microwave corn snack product. It must have been Top Secret. Yeah, that’s the term we want. The information was protected by a very official classified classification, something like: super ultra-magnificent big important clandestine hotstuff. Or SUMBICH.
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G – Chapter 7 – In Security. Spooky. That’s what it’s like to move into a town that hadn’t existed until the government put it there. For one thing, the entire place was what might be called utilitarian.
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eNewsChannels COLUMN: On the surface, this is a book about combat, both personal and professional. But while there are plenty of scenes with bloody battles, all of which are shocking and gripping to read, you will also find humanity, philosophical questioning, and ultimately the cleansing elation of personal redemption.
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G. Chapter 6: Mr. Radioactivity is Your Friend. Bulletin: Warning! This is a test of the emergency government -to-citizen communication system. This is only a test. Of course it’s only a test. Had this been an actual emergency, you can bet your ass I would still be sitting here typing at you.
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G. Chapter 5 – Beautiful Downtown Nowhere. Some of you have been wondering about my sarcastic attitude towards the center of our nation. It’s not so much the geographic center that bugs me as it is the ‘middle of the road.’ I am quite sarcastic about that.
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eNewsChannels COLUMN: A collection of articles about boxing, Katherine Dunn’s ‘One Ring Circus’ covers a lot of road: defense of the sport, call for reforms in the sport, two-fisted literary revelry in the sport, and just plain beautiful writing about the sport.
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G. Chapter 4 – Ooh, That’s a Big One. To save you the trouble of looking it up online, the encephalitis did not kill me. Although there were times I wished for death, like during the torture. Oops, I mean during what the healthcare community describes as ‘a procedure.’
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eNewsChannels COLUMN: Two monumental novels, one phenomenal idea to save America, and a river of lysergic acid diethylamide. For some people, that is the legacy of Ken Kesey, but in the hands of neo-new-journalist Mark Christensen, the tale takes on mythic proportions and is One Hell of a Great Ride.
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G. Chapter 3 – Ten Least Wanted List. The FBI regularly puts out the Ten Most Wanted list. And it is a fun read, let me tell you! You can find it here if you’re interested in killing some time. Or whatever you’re into killing. I don’t know who composes the entries but in some of the descriptions of the guys on the lam, it often seems you can sense just a hint of a chatty tone creeping into the write-ups
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G. Chapter 2: Open Wide and Say Ahhh. Sex is fun, recovery is not. Unless your doctor orders you to get lots of bed rest and gives you a big wink while saying it. Which didn’t happen to me, but I’m just saying.
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eNewsChannels BOOK SERIAL: ‘Secret Sex, A Book Alive Online,’ written and lived by John Scott G. Chapter 1 Your Place in the Universe. Much like you, I came into this world unable to type. That skill was acquired later, allowing me to take part in the highly-paid ‘word nerd’ thing enjoyed by swanky novelists, playwrights, poets, bloggers, and writers of auto dealership advertising.
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eNewsChannels COLUMN: It is easy to say ‘Google it’ because that company has virtually defined the online experience of searching for, well, everything. But there are profound implications in turning over so much hidden power to one company and Siva Vaidhyanathan is not afraid to explore a lot of them.
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eNewsChannels COLUMN: Mounting well-reasoned attacks against those who seek to steal, degrade or destroy creative works is not an easy task these days but Robert Levine accomplishes it with wit, style and taste. That he also points the way toward some possible solutions just makes [...]
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eNewsChannels COLUMN: A lot of us enjoy art while chuckling at the art scene. Let’s face it: they often have a ton of pretention piled up against an ounce of content. So when an exhibit comes along that can tickle your funny bone while causing you to question your own existence, well, ya gotta shout about that from a few rooftops.
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eNewsChannels COLUMN: When you keep someone alive in your heart, it can make a difference in the way you act towards others. Looking back at the death of my dad nearly a decade-and-a-half ago helps me maintain my view of him while changing my view of others.
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COLUMN: Art can take many forms, from painting to sculpture, prints to photography, and music to conceptual performance. It is in that last category that Rachel Rosenthal has distinguished herself. Studying art, theater and dance in Paris and New York in the middle of the [...]
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COLUMN: Some people enjoy serving on juries, or so they say. Forgive me if I don’t believe them, unless these are people with nothing to do and/or who hate their job. For the rest of us, receiving a Summons for Jury Service is enough to [...]
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COLUMN: Does the world need another manufacturer of scented candles? Until recently, many of us would have been indifferent about the answer. Then I met Meike Kopp, owner of a company with the interesting name of Manifest Destiny. Now I realize that other scented candles [...]
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COLUMN: Michael Levine works in public relations yet has become a highly effective motivational speaker. Allow me to confess to being positively affected by his presentation, which is no small feat when you consider that people often describe me as cynical and sardonic (when they [...]
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REVIEW: With the word “Cirque” in their name, some people might be expecting a light and frothy show of tumblers and mimes. Oh would they be wrong. The experience of Cirque Berzerk starts with a dark and brooding atmosphere and then adds hallucinogenic or psychotropic [...]
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COLUMN: Everyone is searching for hopeful economic news and I have some for you. Last night, I attended an unveiling of corporate-sponsored sculpture in staid Woodland Hills, California. Actually, it was a combined art show, modern dance piece, electronic music performance, and happening. Anyone remember [...]
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COLUMN: Several friends asked me a question this week, and with slight variations, it went something like this: “What do you think of that blowhard Rush Limbaugh?” Although for “blowhard” they all used a different word. Donkey orifice. Rooster lollipop. Mom fornicator. My answer was [...]
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COLUMN: Back in middle and high school, I got into trouble. Numerous times, in fact. Not so much for physical acts of stupidity and fighting, although those happened on occasion, but because of things I wrote. Now you may be thinking I scrawled on the [...]
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COLUMN: Political campaigns exist on several levels, some high-minded, some in the gutter. What is interesting this year is the emergence of new code words. With innuendo and subterfuge, a shipload of low-road commentary is being slipped into mainstream discourse. What follows is a brief [...]
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COLUMN: A feature-length documentary called BOMB IT examines all sides of the graffiti controversy, but it’s clearly on the side of the artists. Scott G is in favor of this viewpoint provided you don’t spray paint his neighborhood. As the director of music videos for [...]
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COLUMN: The Q&A format is a time-honored way to promote dialog and discourse, but as Scott G points out, some questions can lead to answers that start an argument, a brawl, or even a war.
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COLUMN: Scott G smiles at the dire headlines bemoaning the evidence of anabolic steroids and human growth hormones in sports; in fact, he comes out in favor of their use.
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COLUMN: Scott G has a few questions about idiocy, lunacy, stupidity, chicanery, avarice, greed, pigheadedness, hatred, loathing, insanity and dangerous superstitions. In other words, he’s been reading the news lately.
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COLUMN: Forget war, deficits, war profiteering, offshore tax loopholes, mistreatment of veterans, rampant religiosity, governmental stupidity, and everything else going on thanks to BushCo. Scott G discovers he’s supposed to write about nonsense.
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COLUMN: The country was nearly bankrupt the last time America put an actor in the White House, but Scott G explores some of the reasons why voters should consider trying it again.
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COLUMN: War, war profiteering, immorality, lies, trickery, deceit, insecurity, budget crises, skyrocketing healthcare costs and a whole lot more need to be blamed on somebody, and Scott G is ready to step up and take the heat. Of course, there is plenty of blame to go around.
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COLUMN: When the estate tax was re-labeled the “death tax” and the laws to allow corporate pollution were called the “Clear Skies Initiative,” Scott G began to think it was time for honest folks to fight back. With votes, sure, but also with better names.
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COLUMN: Like Humpty Dumpty, the morality of Western World seems always about to drop off the wall and shatter into a million pieces. Scott G gathers some information about a fiction-based museum and asks an eyebrow-raising question about religious tax exemptions.
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COLUMN: Scott G presents many myth-busting details about the annual Burning Man celebration held the week before Labor Day on the Playa of Black Rock Desert, 120 miles north of Reno, Nevada.
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COLUMN: How would you like to serve as Honorary Chairman of something called the Business Advisory Counsel? If you have $500 and a strong stomach, Scott G can tell you who to call.
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COLUMN: Scott G talks with the OTHER Dr. Kevorkian and learns a few things about death, grieving and the loss of productivity due to death and grieving. Meet Kriss Kevorkian, former deputy coroner and current Co-Chair of the Los Angeles County Bar Association Bioethics Committee.
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COLUMN: Bribery, kickbacks and stealing, oh my! Have you read all the instructions in the IRS code this year? Of course you haven’t. Scott G hasn’t, either, but he found some interesting items about reporting illegal income.
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COLUMN: Scott G has been paying attention to the taglines in ads. Somebody needs to, because marketers are making a ton of mistakes in this important area of communication. Taglines often seem to be a cute little part of advertising but can actually be a deft tool of marketing. More appropriately called theme lines, they are supposed to help cement the most important brand attributes into the minds of consumers. When they work, it seems like magic.
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COLUMN: Why write a six-word sentence when it’s more fun to use 82 words and a bunch of gobbledygook? Scott G pokes fun at the way some businesses pontificate about themselves online and off.
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INTERVIEW: Matt Forger speaks out to Scott G about everything from working with Michael Jackson to producing new artists like Mutant Radio. According to Matt, a pop song is a three minute fix of an emotional drug. We are connected through our humanity, and most successful songs speak to this.
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COLUMN: Following the announcement of a patent for the video enhanced gravemarker, Scott G ponders the next phase of cemetery chic. Might there be an iTomb in your future? Hats off and a twenty-one gun salute to television commercial producer Robert Barrows, recent recipient of U.S. Patent 7089495 for an invention called the Video Enhanced Gravemarker (VEG).
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COLUMN: Three personal managers of independent artists outline pathways for success in an increasingly competitive marketplace. “An artist’s music must be something I love,” stated Jennifer Yeko of True Talent Management. “It has to be music I want to hear in my personal life as well as when I’m working.”
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The numbers are supposed to be big in online marketing, but are they significant in the online marketing of music? Clearly, we need someone with ‘Net experience to set a few things straight. Scott Meldrum is a businessperson and musician with a dry wit and a background in bulk mail. Oops, excuse me, direct response advertising. He’s also the man called on by major labels when they want to brand an artist and reach millions of fans via the Internet.
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If you’re young enough, all you know is digital music. Forget about records. Or vinyl. Or eight-tracks. Or even cassettes. To these people, the brouhaha over digital rights management and pay-per-download models seems pretty silly. And the changeover from physical products to sound files isn’t even an issue for them.
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Where music meets licensing, there’s money to be made. How much money? “I have synched quite a few thousand songs into productions over the years,” states Peter Jansson of CRC Jianian Co., “and have charged anywhere between US$1.00 and US$250,000 for each one.”
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Some ad campaigns don’t work. Like the recent mistake of putting an American Idol winner in a retail automotive ad. Scott G comments on Ford’s chopping of Taylor Hicks.
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Copywriters and art directors get much of the attention in the ad world, but Scott G is one creative director who claims it’s the account management function that controls how a campaign soars or collapses.




